


Heart's Desire

by MarkGale



Category: NCIS, Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Anti-Lindsay, Anti-Michael, Character Bashing, F/F, Gibbs and Brian are not a couple tho, Gibbs/Brian, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, It's just for comfort, Justin/OC - Freeform, M/M, Male Slash, Minor Character Death, Out of Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-21
Updated: 2017-09-28
Packaged: 2019-01-01 06:18:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 14,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12150465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarkGale/pseuds/MarkGale
Summary: AU/Crossover: QaF/NCIS! Pairings: Brian/Justin and Gibbs/TonyStory is filled with both, canon and fictional events. Tony, who's in love with Gibbs, sees Gibbs with another man. The other man is secretly in love with a young man named Justin. Will Tony win Gibbs' heart? And will the other man - Brian - win Justin's?





	1. Chapter 1

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=se4rwn)

It was a normal day at NCIS. Tony, Ellie and McGee were typing some reports, reviewing cold cases and chatting along as the time flew by. Gibbs had been in MTAC since he had arrived early in the morning and only joined his team in the bullpen after lunch time. It was quiet and the chatter light. Tony loved those quiet moments because he had the chance to watch his boss closely. He had it bad for Gibbs since they'd met in Baltimore over 12 years ago. It started out as physical attraction but he realized pretty quickly that he had fallen for the silver haired Special Agent. Not that he would have actually acted on it. Gibbs, 2nd B for bastard, was straight and nothing but straight. Married 4 times, divorced 3 times. So Tony had decided to admire the older men, to fantasize about him but to never come on to the man. Whenever Gibbs had dated someone tho, he had been jealous, heartbroken and wishing those women nothing good. Lately, Gibbs hadn't seem to date so there wasn't any 'danger' for Tony and he could watch his boss without worrying or thinking about the lucky woman who could be so damn close to him while Tony couldn't.

He was raised out of his thoughts by the ding of the elevator which signaled that someone had arrived. Tony had a good view but didn't recognize the man walking towards them. The stranger must had been around 40 years, dark brown hair with greenish brown eyes and very kissable lips. The visitor tag he was wearing didn't required a name so Tony had no clue. He did notice that Ellie and Tim were checking out the man as well while Gibbs didn't seem to have noticed anyone arriving as he was busy signing a bunch of papers.

The man however, had walked up to Ellie's desk and looked expectedly at Tony's boss. With a sigh, Gibbs threw his pen away and collected the papers and handed them to McGee. He then grabbed his jacket and greeted the stranger with one of his rare smiles.

_"I see you made it."_ Gibbs said walking towards the man.

_"Always. You know me."_ The stranger replied and was hugged by the silver haired man.

_"Good to see you, Bri. Let's get some lunch."_ Gibbs said softly before he turned to call out to his team. _"I'm off for the afternoon. DiNozzo, you're in charge. Told Vance to let you guys go home early tho."_

'What the hell was that' Tony thought. 'Ugh, actually WHO the hell was that?' he re-arranged his thoughts while he was watching Gibbs and the stranger - Bri? - leave.

 

* * *

 

Tony opened the door to Gibbs' house and was surprised to see that it was all dark. It wasn't that late yet so he thought that Gibbs was out with the strange guy named Bri and was about to turn around until he heard some noise. Tony slowly and carefully walked up the stairs and listened quietly to figure out where the noise was coming from. He stood right in front of a room he had never been in: Gibbs' bedroom.

He slowly opened the door and froze: Gibbs was on top of the younger man, pounding into his ass fast and hard. The room was filled with moans from the active men and the smell of sex had permeated the air. The younger man's hand gripped the sheets tightly. Neither man seemed to noticed Tony standing shocked, mouth open and wide eyes, in the door frame. Shaking his head to regain control again, Tony quietly closed the door and made his way downstairs and ran out of the house of the man he was secretly in love with. When he reached his car, he drove away as fast as possible, knowing he wouldn't get the images out of his head anytime soon.

 

* * *

 

 He paced his living room, drank beer and watched tv, even tried to read a book but nothing could distract him. His thoughts always went back to Gibbs fucking this Bri guy. Tony couldn't believe it. His secret crush having sex with a man. How could he have miss that? Tony had always been sure that Leroy Jethro Gibbs was straight. He would have to find out more about this man and his connection to Gibbs. Tony was dealing with so many mixed emotions that sleep was nowhere in sight for him that night. He knew he had to get a grip on himself before he could face Gibbs the following day at work. He wanted to be this Bri guy, he wanted to be the one Gibbs took to bed and made love to. His jealousy was overwhelming and his heart hurt. He never found any sleep that night.

**TBC**


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: We do not own any of the characters! We only play with them for a bit but will give them back in one piece. The characters, shows and canon storylines that we might use, belong to their respective creators and owners.

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=akelfl)

Tony noticed that everything - and everyone - was back to normal. Neither Tim nor Ellie seemed to question the stranger from the day before. Well, that was until Gibbs was out of sight. The three agents discussed and argued about the situation and tried to guess what kind of connection there could be. Tony had no intention to tell his colleagues about Gibbs and 'Bri' having sex.

_"There's cameras everywhere in this building. Abby and I could try to find out his identity with the face recognition program. What do you think?"_ McGee suggested.

_"Sounds good, McIdeas. Ellie, do you think you could use your NSA contacts?"_ Tony wondered.

_"I could try but I would need at his full name at least. Don't think I'd come far with 'Bri'."_ Ellie told them.

_"That's my job. And Abby's of course. If we find out his name Ellie can try her contacts and I'll do a background search of this guy. He seemed kinda arrogant."_ Tim said.

_"You think? I think he was cute, good looking."_ Ellie said dreamily. At the looks she got from Tony and McGee she stopped daydreaming and snapped. _"What? I'm single. I can look and I can definitely see a good looking man if I pass one."_

_"Okay, okay."_ Tim answered.

_"Enough chatting. We have a job to do. Tim, go and meet our favorite mistress of the dark. Ellie and I will back you up."_ Tony summed up the first step of their plan and Tim went off to see Abby in her lab while Tony and Ellie went back to their cold cases.

 

* * *

 

 

**Later that day**

_"His name is Brian Kinney, 42 years old and an ad expert. He's really good at that. He once was responsible for an NCIS ad campaign. He most likely met Gibbs around that time. Oh and the best news: He's gay. And hot."_ Abby almost gleamed at the last part of her findings.

_"Why do you and Ellie think he's hot?"_ Tim asked confused. _"He's skinny and old."_

_"McGee!"_ Abby exclaimed and punched his arm. _"Are you saying that older men can't be hot and attractive? Look at Tony. He's in his 40's and super hot. Or look at my favorite silver fox. Gibbs is a lot older and still so sexy and hot."_

Tony just rolled his eyes and tried his best not to nod in agreement about Gibbs. The others couldn't find out about his feelings for Gibbs.

_"Abby is right, Tim. If a man takes care of himself he can still be very attractive when he is older. Not that Gibbs would be using creams or any other stuff because... yeah... well, he's Gibbs."_ Ellie said.

_"Yup. Gibbs was born to be hot and sexy in his silver fox ages."_ Abby agreed.

_"Okay, okay I got it. Can we please go back to this Brian guy? Is he a friend of Gibbs?"_ Tim tried to change the topic.

'Hmmpf... friend, more like fuck buddy' Tony thought.

_"No clue. The only one who could tell us is Gibbs. Or Mr. Brian Kinney."_ Abby told them.

_"As if Gibbs would tell us anything about him."_ Tim scoffed.

_"Abby could talk to Gibbs."_ Ellie suggested.

_"Yup I could. And on Friday, the four of us will go out clubbing... at Babylon. The coolest gay club in town. That's where Brian usually hangs out."_ Abby told them happily.

_"Okay."_ Tim said with a hint of fear in his voice. Tony just nodded and Ellie smiled brightly in agreement.

_"It's a date then. Now hush hush... I will talk to Gibbs about his super hot friend. Out now."_ Abby told them.

 

* * *

 

 

**Thursday**

The elevator doors opened and Tony got out, seeing Ellie and Tim sitting at their desks but Gibbs nowhere in sight.

_"Let me guess, probies... Gibbs is stuck in MTAC again?"_ Tony asked his colleagues when he reached his desk.

_"Actually, he's not here yet. Nobody has seen him."_ Ellie answered warily.

_"What, are you saying that Gibbs is late?"_ Tony said jokingly.

_"Um yeah... that's what we are saying, Tony."_ Tim said.

Tony was about to say something when the voice of Director Vance rang through the bullpen. _"Agent DiNozzo. My office."_

'Fuck' Tony thought. 'I swear if he sent Gibbs undercover without backup or anything I will kill him.' Tony shared one last worried look with Tim and Ellie before he ran up to the stairs to meet with Vance.

**TBC**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We finally learn a little bit about the strange man. Well, of course it's Brian Kinney (a hottie, right?). Anyways, any guesses where Gibbs could be? And has Brian something to do with it? If yes, what? Let's wait for the next chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team learns about the bombing of a club... just what does Gibbs have to do with it?

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=20fwz94)

**Vance Office**

_"What? Hospital? Bomb? What the hell happened to Gibbs?"_ Tony was panicking.

_"There was a gay wedding yesterday. Small ceremony. Gibbs was invited. Later, in the evening, the newlyweds and their guests celebrated at Babylon. It's a gay club owned by a friend of the pair. It seems, somebody wasn't happy about a same sex marriage and placed a bomb in the club. Gibbs was injured. He's at the hospital. From what I have heard from my sources at the local Police Department, Gibbs helped looking for victims and organized the search. It wasn't until everyone was found - dead or alive - that he broke down. I already sent Dr. Mallard to the hospital. He will keep me updated about Gibbs' injuries and condition."_ Vance explained the situation to Tony.

_"I... shit. I need to go to the hospital. WE need to go there. We need to see Gibbs."_ Tony said.

_"Not yet. We are working with the FBI and you are in charge now, Agent DiNozzo. I need you and your team to work with Fornell and find out who placed the bomb. This is a hate crime. When Fornell heard that Gibbs was injured he wanted you, Agents McGee and Bishop as well as Mrs. Sciuto and Dr. Mallard to work the case with him. I want you to look at the recording material from the press and do background searches on all the guests. Everyone who's a gay hater is a suspect. As soon as we hear from Dr. Mallard, you can go to the hospital and question Gibbs. I decided to leave that task to you and Fornell agreed."_ Vance told him.

_"Thank you, Director. We will find whoever did this. We won't disappoint you. Or Gibbs."_ Tony vowed.

 

* * *

 

 

To say that Gibbs' team was shocked was the understatement of the year. Abby couldn't stop the tears from falling at the gruesome hatred against homosexuals. Ellie just stared wide eyed, not able to say anything at all. Tim's mouth opened and closed again and again, he desperately wanted to say something but simply couldn't. The hate crime that also got their beloved Gibbs injured was too much for them to understand. Tony had tried to tell them as gently and patiently as possible but he knew that he had to get them back to work. They had a crime to solve.

_"These bastards will pay, Tony. We'll get them and put them behind bars for the rest of their undeserving lives."_ Abby said determined after a couple of minutes in pure shock.

_"Yes, we will! For all the victims. For Gibbs."_ Tony said and the four of them parted to do their jobs.

Tim was checking the guest list as well as the caterer, techniques and more and did background researches while Ellie went with Fornell, who shortly after their quick campfire appeared, to secure the crime scene and collect more evidence for Abby. Fornell brought about 20 boxes of evidence with him but more was about to come.

_"Tony, Tim... check the parents of the groom Hendrik. And the father of the other groom, Justin._ _As far as I'm concerned he was raised by his mother and nobody knows a damn thing about his father but try to find anything tho._ _They were against this marriage. Hendrik was disowned by his parents. When I informed Hendrik's parents about the bomb, well, they didn't seem to be very surprised or shocked at all."_ Fornell told them. Tim nodded and went back to the task at hand.

Fornell turned to Tony, _"Was a small ceremony but the party was bigger. The owner of the club, Brian Kinney, had the usual dancers and service people working. There were over 200 people in the club when the bomb exploded. So far, we have over 50 dead bodies. Only about 30 people got out almost uninjured. The rest is at the hospital. Some are heavily injured. You heard anything from Ducky?"_ He asked Tony.

_"Not yet. Vance sent him to the hospital to check up on Gibbs. You said Brian Kinney is the owner of the club? He's been here to pick up Gibbs on Monday."_ Tony told the FBI Agent.

_"Yeah, they're friends. Kinney wasn't majorly injured. Told us about the pair's parents. The LGBT community here in D.C. is pretty big and most know the club and Kinney. And... Gibbs. He's part of that community. Not really active but he supports them. He's friends with many of the victims. This is going to be tough on him."_ Fornell said.

_"We'll find out who was responsible for the crime. And we'll be there for Gibbs. Nobody here is going to let him down. And his own sexual preferences doesn't matter. He's Gibbs, the hardest and best Agent this agency has ever had."_ Tony told Fornell.

_"Yeah... well, kinda funny. Gibbs told me something similar about you not too long ago. He's proud of you, DiNutso. He knows you'll do a good job with the team in his absence. You're the best young Agent he's ever worked with. He told me that."_ Fornell didn't want to hide that Gibbs was very proud of Tony and put all of his confidence on the man to him because he knew Tony needed to hear it.

_"Thanks. I will honor Gibbs and so will the team. We won't let him down."_ Tony said with a small smile.

 

* * *

 

 

**_ Flashback: Two months earlier _ **

_"Dad? You home?" A voice rang through the house. Gibbs was down in his basement, working on a crib for his friend's next baby._

_"Basement." Gibbs yelled. He heard someone walking down the stairs and without even looking for the guest, he greeted. "Hey Sunshine. What brings you here in the middle of the night?"_

_"Just wanted to see you, Dad." The young man said and when he reached Gibbs, the two of them shared a hug._

_"Good to see you. How's your head? Any more headaches?" Gibbs asked._

_"Nope. It's all good. Brian bought me a computer so I can continue to draw and all with my shitty hand." The young man told him._

_"Justin," Gibbs sighed. "You were heavily injured not too long ago. Give yourself some credit. When you woke up from the coma you couldn't use your hand at all. It takes time for your body to fully recover. Don't put too much pressure on yourself." Gibbs spoke gently._

_"I know, Dad. I just wish the bashing never happened. Thank God Brian was there or I'd have died there. Hobbs bashed me and ran away." Justin remembered._

_"He's an asshole. But you're right about Brian." Gibbs smiled at his son. Of course, Justin wasn't his son by blood, hell Gibbs never even dated his mom._

_"Brian's a good friend. I owe him so much. It was really nice from him to go to the prom with me. Wish it could have been Hendrik tho. And while we are speaking of Hendrik, I've got to tell you something. He asked me to marry him, Dad." Justin said smiling brightly._

_"He.. what?" Gibbs asked. "Marry? Justin, aren't you both too young?"_

_"Dad, we're in love and we want to spend the rest of our lives together. I said yes." Justin told him happily._

_"Wow... I was not expecting this." Gibbs said and couldn't help but think of Brian. Gibbs knew the older man was desperately in love with Justin but wouldn't interfere in the blonde's relationship._

_"We're getting married very soon. A small ceremony but we'll have a huge party later at Babylon. I already asked Brian. He's happy for me and agreed for us to celebrate at his club." Justin said._

_"I'm happy for you, too Justin." Gibbs smiled and hugged the blonde man he loved as if he were his own son._

_"So, will you bring a date?" Justin asked curiously._

_"Don't think so, Sunshine." Gibbs answered honestly._

_"I was thinking... you could ask Very Special Agent DiNozzo to join you." Justin grinned._

_"Hell no, Justin. I told you to let it go." Gibbs sighed._

_"Why? You're in love with him. You should tell him, you HAVE to tell him, Dad." Justin said._

_"Tony is straight, Justin. And I told you that I don't want to spend too much time with him outside of work because it hurts like hell." Gibbs said sternly._

_"I know. I just want you to be happy, Dad. You deserve it." Justin said sadly._

_"As long as you are happy, I am, too." Gibbs said sincerely._

**_ End Flashback _ **

**TBC**


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony meets Brian Kinney - will his jealousy cause some conflict or will he and Brian get along?

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=2638txx)

**Present Time: At the hospital**

Tony was pacing the waiting room, wanting to see Gibbs to make sure the Agent is fine. He stopped pacing when he heard a door opening and closing and turned around to see none other than Brian Kinney - the guy Gibbs had fucked earlier this week. Taking a deep breath, Tony tried to stay calm and not show his jealousy.

_"Brian Kinney?"_ He asked but got no response from the other man. He walked towards the man and put his hand on Kinney's shoulder, startling the other man slightly.

_"What the fuck? Who are you? And ever heard about announcing yourself before you touch someone?"_ The man said angrily.

_"Called your name but you didn't answer. I'm Special Agent DiNozzo, NCIS. I have a few questions if you don't mind."_ Tony said and noticed the hard expression on Brian turning softer.

_"You're Tony? Anthony DiNozzo Jr?"_ Brian asked and saw Tony nodding. _"Nice to finally meet you. Jethro told me a helluva lot about you."_ Brian offered his hand and Tony accepted it. He gestured to the chairs and the two of them sat down.

_"If you don't mind, I have a few questions and was hoping you would answer them."_ Tony said.

_"Sure, talked to Fornell from the FBI already but I know that Jethro trusts you more than anyone else when it comes to the job."_ Brian replied, 'and outside of work as well', he thought to himself.

Tony wanted to scream at the guy for calling Gibbs by his second name again but he calmed himself quickly. _"So, tell me about everything. How does Gibbs fit into the community and this whole tragedy?"_

_"Well,"_ Brian began, _"it's a rather long story. Justin Taylor - one of the grooms - is like a son to Jethro. Justin's mom, Jennifer, but we call her Jen, was raped and got pregnant. The rapist was sent to prison and he's still there, rotting away. Anyways, Jen was shopping when she got her contraction and broke down in the middle of the mall. Nobody tried to help her or ask if she was okay tho. People just passed her and let her lie there. Well, that was until Jethro noticed her. He was out to get some groceries when he saw her. She was scared as hell at first but then she clung on to him like he was her only life line. Jethro called an ambulance and went with her. He was with her when Justin was born and Jethro kind of made it his job to take care of them. Justin is like a son to him, Jethro calls him his son and Justin calls him dad. I mean, Jethro is the only dad Justin's ever had. Anyways, when Justin realized that he was gay he came to my club with his best friend Daphne. That's how I met him. We became friends and he and Daphne became part of my... family, you know. Michael Novotny and his husband Ben Bruckner and their son Hunter, Michael's mom Debbie and his uncle Vic, the munchers Lindsay and Melanie, Emmeth and Ted and of course, my own son Gus. After a while, Justin introduced us to his father and Jethro became a part of the family as well. We're all close. Anyways, Justin met Hendrik in college. It was love at first sight according to the two of them. Soon, the prom came but Hendrik, who studied medicine, had to go away for a week for a seminar so Justin asked me if I'd go to prom with him. I agreed and after the dance he brought me to my car. I was about to cut the engine and drive away when I saw two guys with a baseball bat following Justin. Chris Hobbs and Ethan Gold. I tried to warn Justin but he was too far away and they hit his head. He was in a coma for two weeks and needed rehabilitation and therapy for almost six months. Hobbs and Gold got away with a simple assault instead of a hate crime, which it was. You know, Justin is a talented artist, he draws and paint like a God. It took a very while for him to deal with the nightmares and the brain damage they have caused but he never gave up. His mom Jen, passed away two weeks before the prom. Debbie calls him Sunshine, and yeah well, we all call him that. When he smiles it's like it lights the entire room wherever he is. And last night was supposed to be the happiest day of his life. But now it's a nightmare. Hendrik is gone, there was nothing anyone could have done for him. They haven't told Justin yet, Jethro wants to do that. Jethro's best friend Joe is in ICU waiting for his fiancé Frank to come out of surgery. Emmeth and Ted are fine, Hunter was in Disney Land so he's alright. Lindsay and Melanie just left minutes before the bomb went off to bring Gus and JR home. JR is Jenny Rebeca. Michael Novotny is her father by the way. Forgot to mention that earlier. Anyways, Michael and Ben are fine as well. Many of the dancers that I knew for years are either injured or dead. It's a fucking nightmare."_ Brian said and finished with a sigh and a lone tear.

_"Wow, I never knew that about Gibbs. He never mentioned Justin or anyone of you."_ Tony said sadly.

_"I know. He wants to protect us because of the enemies you guys make in your line of work. But trust me when I tell you that Jethro thinks very highly of you and if he would have shared any of this with anyone, it would have been you."_ Brian told him.

_"And what is it with you and Gibbs? I saw you two... in his bed."_ Tony muttered.

Brian, the smart guy he is, noticed the hint of jealousy and sadness in Tony's voice and facial expressions and was happy for his friend. _"We're not an item or anything. It was just sex. To get it out of our system. We both yearn for someone we can't have."_ Brian made sure to look directly at Tony at the last part.

_"I see."_ Tony said sadly, not realizing what Brian had tried to tell him. _"Anyways, can you tell me anything about Hendrik's parents?"_

'Back to business, I see' Brian thought to himself. _"They disowned Hendrik. They wouldn't accept his 'choice' to be with a man. As if it was a choice."_ Brian said angrily.

_"Ignorance and intolerance are still a huge problem, even after all those years. I've seen it many times. Even with DADT gone, it's still there."_ Tony told him.

The two men then sat in silence for a while until a doctor came out to tell them about Gibbs' condition.

_"He should be fine very soon. No permanent damage although the burns with probably leave some scars if he doesn't take care of them properly. He will be released tomorrow but should stay at home and in bed at least for a week. I won't declare him fit for at least a month. He needs to rest and take care of himself. Is he living with someone? It would be better if there was someone with him."_ The doctor said.

_"He's living alone but he has many friends who would happily look out for him."_ Tony said but the doctor shook his head no.

_"He needs someone to be there day and night. He needed a lot of stitches for the cuts and shouldn't move around too much."_ The doctor explained.

_"Agent DiNozzo is leading the investigation along with Agent Fornell from the FBI, I think he could stay with Agent Gibbs for a while and still be able to oversee the investigation as Agent Fornell is a friend of Agent Gibbs as well and will most likely check in on him a couple of times."_ Brian told the doctor before he turned to Tony. _"Right, Agent DiNozzo?"_

_"Um yeah... well... I... Yes. That won't be a problem."_ Tony said finally. Brian nodded with a small smile.

**TBC**


	5. Chapter 5

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=2ebsjs4)

Tony was stunned about Brian's behavior. He couldn't help but wonder why that guy wanted him to take care of Gibbs. Of course, Tony really wanted to be there for Gibbs and help him recover but he didn't think that being so close to him was a good idea. He was afraid that Gibbs would notice his feelings... not that he would fear for his job. Gibbs was open minded and supportive towards the gay community. But romantic feelings could hurt their friendship. And since obviously Gibbs was more into random fucks and not into committed relationships, Tony thought about a way to not be the one to take care of him. Brian, who was still sitting next to him, had other ideas.

_"You know, Justin will have a hard time to deal with the loss of Hendrik and Jethro will try to do his best to be there for his son. But you've heard the doctor, he needs to recover from his injuries and needs some rest. You work with him, you know him very good. He won't agree to lay down and rest. He will want to be there for Justin and I happen to know that you have the balls to stand up to him and call him out on his shit."_ Brian said and looked with a raised eyebrow and a smirk at Tony.

_"Wouldn't that be a better job for you since you know about his balls?"_ Tony muttered angrily.

_"Oh boy... you don't get it, don't you? We were just fucking."_ Brian said annoyed.

_"I get it. I do, okay? Gibbs likes to fuck like every other guy. And it happens that he likes to fuck you to get whatever it is that bothers him out of his system."_ Tony snapped.

_"God, how many hints do I need to drop for you to get it?"_ Brian snorted.

_"And what do I need to get?"_ Tony retorted.

_"There is a reason why I said YOU should take care of him. He NEEDS you to be there with him. Just like YOU need to be. But you are too dense to get it. You're too busy drowning in self pity because he was fucking me and not you but let me tell you something: Be the guy you always are. The Tony he wants and needs and for fuck's sake, grow some balls and go get the man you want because he wants you just as much."_ Brian yelled and then got up and left a stunned looking Tony in the waiting room.

 

* * *

 

 

Gibbs was alive! Tony repeated it in his head like a mantra. Seeing Gibbs lying there in the hospital bed made him want to cry. Watching him talking to the nurse who was checking his vital signs made his heart beating faster. When the nurse came out she gestured for Tony to enter. He took a deep breath before he entered.

_"Gibbs."_ He said gently. _"How are you? Any pain?"_

_"Ton.. DiNozzo. I'm fine."_ Gibbs answered tiredly.

_"You don't look fine."_ Tony told him gently.

_"Yeah, you're right. I'm not too fine. Tired but not in pain."_ Gibbs said honestly.

_"That's good. I was... we were shocked when he heard what happened."_ Tony admitted when he sat down next to Gibbs.

_"Fornell on the case?"_ Gibbs asked.

_"Yes, he is. And we're helping. FBI and NCIS working together again but of course the FBI will get all the credit in the end."_ Tony joked.

_"Hmh yeah. Tony... is... Justin Taylor, is he okay?"_ Gibbs asked, almost whispering.

_"He is. Broken arm and a concussion but other than that, he's fine."_ Tony said and could see the relief on Gibbs face, especially in his eyes.

_"Thank God."_ Gibbs said quietly with closed eyes. "You have any news about the other guests?"

Tony knew whom Gibbs was talking about thanks to Brian. _"I hope I get it all right. Uhm... Michael, Ben and their son Hunter_?" Tony said but it sounded more like a question. He continued at Gibbs' nod. _"They're fine. Ted and Emmeth are, too. Debbie and Carl are not injured, too. Lindsay and Melody..."_ Tony said but Gibbs interrupted him.

_"Melanie, not Melody although it sounds nice."_ Gibbs smirked.

_"Yeah, Melanie... Lindsay and Melanie left with their kids shortly before the bomb exploded. They're safe."_ Tony said.

_"What about Hendrik?"_ Gibbs asked.

_"He didn't make it. I'm sorry, Gibbs."_ Tony said sadly.

_"Shit. I need to see Justin. It will break his heart."_ Gibbs whispered.

_"From what I heard, the doctors are keeping him sedated to keep his stress level down."_ Tony answered.

_"Good. What about Joe? And Frank?"_ Gibbs then asked.

_"Joe is fine, hardly injured but Frank is... he's in a coma. Joe is with him."_ Tony told him.

_"No! Fuck. This is so fucked up."_ Gibbs muttered angrily. _"What about Brian?"_

_"He's good. In fact, he's in the waiting room."_ Tony told him.

_"Can you bring him here?"_ Gibbs asked.

_"Sure."_ Tony said nicely but it pissed him off that Gibbs would ask to see the man.

 

* * *

 

 

** 10 MINUTES LATER **

_"Could you stay with him and make sure he's alright?"_ Gibbs asked.

_"You don't have to ask, Jeth. You know I would do anything for him."_ Brian said.

Tony watched the conversation between the two happily. Gibbs didn't ask for Brian because he wanted to see him. He wanted Brian to take care of Justin. At least, that's what the conversation was about now.

At first, Gibbs wanted Brian to bring Justin to his house so he could take care of Justin himself but Brian told him no and made it clear that Gibbs would go home with Tony to rest and recover. It was the first time that Tony allowed himself to grin smugly - directly at Gibbs. And it made him grin even more to see Brian doing the very same. In the end, Gibbs had no choice, he had to agree with the two men but he would still make sure that Justin was taken care of.

_"If he needs anything or wants to see me you'll bring him to me tho, did you understand that, Brian?"_ Gibbs was just as clear as Tony and Brian.

_"Of course, I will. So, I'll take care of Sunshine and Tony will take care of you. Good that we finally have that settled."_ Brian said.

**TBC**


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony's in charge of the team... and Justin shares a secret with papa Gibbs

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=172s1u)

**3 days later**

Gibbs had been brought home by Tony and Brian but the last left right away again to go back to the hospital where Justin was still getting his treatment. Tony could see how hard the last days had been for Gibbs. The older man's shoulders and entire body were tense, his eyes were either empty or filled with unshed tears. Too many of his friends had gotten hurt and the young blonde man he calls his son had lost his husband.

Tony still remembered the moment in which Gibbs and Brian told Justin about his husband's passing.  
**_-Flashback-_**  
_"A bomb? Why? Who would place a bomb at my wedding?" asked Justin._

_"We don't know why and who it was yet but the investigation is being shared by the FBI and my team. They'll figure it all out and I can promise you that whoever did this will pay." Gibbs promised._

_"Are the others okay? What about Hendrik? Where is he? Dad, where's Hendrik?" Justin asked, sounding desperate._

_"He..." Gibbs began but stopped to take a deep breath. "He didn't make it, Justin. I'm sorry. When the ambulance arrived, they... they couldn't help him." Gibbs answered softly. Justin began to cry and shake his head in disbelieve._

_"He didn't feel anything, he didn't suffer." Brian said softly to Justin, talking his hand and massaging it gently._

_"I... I can't believe he's not here anymore. We were so happy." Justin whispered._  
**_-End of Flashback-_ **

Seeing Gibbs interact with Justin opened Tony's eyes regarding his boss. Of course he knew that Gibbs always had a soft spot for children but Tony had never seen Gibbs in parent mode before. It amazed him.

After tucking Gibbs into bed, Tony left to get back to the head quarter to check on the team and investigation.

 

* * *

 

 

 _"You got anything for me?"_ Tony asked his team.

 _"Yeah, hold on for a second..."_ answered McGee. _"Alright, we found Fingerprints and dna on the bomb and they match Hendrik's parents. Fornell is getting them. He'll bring them here for questioning and he wants you in interrogation with him."_

 _"Good. Were the families of the dead guests informed?"_ Tony turned to ask Ellie.

 _"Yes, of course. Also, McGee and I went to the other guests to question them. Nobody could say much about the bomb as they were dancing or busy celebrating when the bomb detonated. It happened too fast for anyone to realize anything had happened."_ Ellie told him.

About 2 hours later, Tony and Fornell had left the interrogation room with the confession of Hendrik's parents. They had placed the bomb to ruin the wedding not knowing that only the celebration after the actual ceremony took place at Babylon. And their plan to get rid of Justin fired back brutally with the blonde being alive and their own son dead.

 

* * *

 

 

** 5 days later **

Brian brought Justin to Gibbs' house after the blonde was released from the hospital. Tony was still at NCIS to wrap up everything from the case and Brian left to do some grocery shopping.

 _"Dad, do you think Hendrik's death is punishment for me?"_ Justin asked in a quiet voice.

 _"Punishment? What for?"_ Gibbs asked confused.

 _"Prom."_ Answered Justin.

 _"God Justin, NO! Why would you be punished for getting bashed by a homophobe ass like Hobbs?"_ Gibbs asked.

 _"Not for that. I cheated on Hendrik. With Brian. When we danced we... kissed. I told you about it, Dad. And now Hendrik's gone."_ Justin explained quietly.

 _"Justin, that's bullshit and you know that. He's gone because his parents could not accept him for who he is. I know you kissed Brian but you told me that it was just a thing in the moment kiss. And Hendrik forgave you and never once blamed Brian. Or you. He told you that you're young and inexperienced so he wasn't mad at you or Brian because of the kiss. What happened at Babylon, it was not your fault, Justin. And the loss of Hendrik is in no way punishment for you."_ Gibbs told his son softly. _"You know I have always been proud of you and nothing will ever change that. You will always remember Hendrik as your first, the time you two had will always be a part of you."_

 _"Actually Dad, please don't be mad but he wasn't my first."_ Justin admitted shyly.

 _"He wasn't?"_ Gibbs asked.

 _"No, my first was... promise me you won't be mad!"_ Justin demanded.

 _"I promise to try and not be bad. But if that guy hurt you in any way or forced you then I'll be mad."_ Gibbs answered honestly.

 _"No, nothing like that. It was Brian. I had a little crush on him back then. It was before I even met Hendrik."_ Justin said.

Gibbs blinked a couple of times before he laughed out loud, thinking of the irony. Justin had a crush on Brian once, now Brian is in love with Justin. He couldn't stop humorless laugh.

 _"God Justin, I'm not mad. Brian's a good guy. I know he acts like he doesn't give a damn about anyone but we know that's his way of protecting himself from getting hurt. And trust me, Brian truly cares about you."_ Gibbs said.

 _"I know he does. He's a great friend."_ Justin answered with a yawn.

**TBC**


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Gibbs are finally honest to each other about their feelings...

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=2nvt45c)

Tony couldn't believe what he had just heard. Brian and Justin... he did gather that Brian was hopelessly in love with Justin but he didn't think there had ever been anything between the two of them. Now he was learning that Justin used to have a crush on Brian. Why didn't they get together back then? How did Brian end up fucking with Gibbs?

He knew it wasn't okay to listen to a private conversation and he really didn't plan to do it. It just happened, sort of. Tony felt bad but also more confused than before. He couldn't even ask Gibbs about Brian and Justin without admitting that he had listened to his conversation with Justin. Tony let out a frustrated sigh.

 

* * *

 

 

_"Hey... mind if I join you a bit?"_ Tony asked quietly, not wanting to startle Gibbs.

_"Sure. Make yourself at home."_ Gibbs answered without looking up.

_"How's Justin?"_ Tony asked.

_"He's... getting better. Physically I mean. The injuries are healing nicely."_ Gibbs said.

_"That's good. What about you? Are you taking your meds? And, do you think you're fit enough to be down here and working on... what it is?"_ Tony wondered.

_"A closet for Justin and Hen... it's for Justin's apartment. I'm not doing heavy lifting or anything. I'm careful and yes, I do take my meds and take it easy. Case is closed now?"_

_"Yes, reports are written and everything is good. The rest is up to the judge."_ Tony told his boss.

_"Good. Tony, I um... I wanted to thank you. For taking care of the case and the team and for being here."_ Gibbs said gently.

_"Gibbs, for the case and the team, it's my job to do this when you're not around. It's also my job to watch your six on the job. But being here has nothing to do with the job. I'm here because I want to be. You're important to me, you matter. And I was scared to hell when Vance told me about the bomb."_ Tony told him gently.

_"Yeah, but you had your hands full with the case and Fornell, the team and Vance. Still, I'm glad you're here."_ Gibbs said softly.

_"Me, too."_ Tony whispered. At this moment, he decided to take the next step. In the past couple of days he kept thinking of Brian's words about why he should be staying with Gibbs. He desperately hoped that he was interpreting Brian's words right. He took a deep breath and walked closer to Gibbs, placing his hand on the older man's shoulder.

_"Gibbs... I... I needed to be here. I wanted to be here. With you."_ Tony almost whispered. Gibbs turned around to look at Tony.

_"I wanted you to be here."_ Gibbs whispered back and slowly closed the distance between them. When their lips met, neither men could stop the moan and soon enough, Gibbs' fingers were softly gripping Tony's hair while his other hand was roaming over the younger man's back. Tony's hands were placed around Gibbs' neck and waist, pushing him closer to himself.

 

* * *

 

 

** The next morning **

Tony woke up with his head on Gibbs' chest, his feet and arms carefully draped around the older man. He couldn't stop his smile even if he wanted to. Gibbs slowly moved his head to look at the younger man.

_"Morning."_ He whispered, smiling at Tony.

Tony smiled even more before he mouthed 'morning' as well. He crawled a little higher to gently kiss Gibbs.

Their almost make out session was interrupted by a loud yell that startled the two of them, but they recovered quickly to get up. Gibbs panicked when he realized that it was Justin who screamed in panic. The two of them ran out of the bedroom down to Justin's room. Tony managed to grab his gun before he ran but soon figured that he didn't need it.

When they reached Justin's room the door was wide open and Brian was sitting on the blonde's bed, hugging the trembling man, trying to calm and reassure him of being safe. Brian's eyes met Gibbs shortly and after sharing a quick nod, Gibbs took Tony's hand and they went into the kitchen, leaving Justin with Brian.

**TBC**


	8. Chapter 8

[ ](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=2mpy712)

 

** 6 Days Later **

The team showed up at Gibbs' house regularly, needing to make sure that Gibbs was truly alright. Today was the day the trial would start and for the first time, the team had met the famous gang of Liberty Avenue. Tony was still staying with Gibbs. He and Brian got along better now that Tony understood the dynamics between the three men and he came to care about Justin very much.

Abby, of course, got along well with everyone. She and Ellie couldn't stop gushing about the attractive men in the group. While both still thought that Brian was the hottest, Ben came a close second. Hunter, Ben and Michael's son, arrived as soon as he heard about the bombing. They were all sitting together in Gibbs' living room and listened to everything the gang told them.

_"I'm so glad everyone is alright. We never knew that Gibbs had family in the gay community but I'm really glad about that now that we know. You guys are all so brave and really nice."_ Ellie said with tears in her eyes after learning about the bashing and how this group of different characters came together.

_"We knew all about you guys. Our Gibbs here told us all about you. He's so damn proud of his team."_ Deb told them, her wig firmly in place.

_"Oh I can imagine what Gibbs has told you. I'm sure we all had some rather regrettable moments during our time at NCIS, right Tony?"_ Tim said teasingly.

_"Yes, McSmartAss. Lots of stories to share for sure but not today. It's a shitty day, especially for Justin. I'm really worried about him. Seeing Hendrick's parents will be hard. I wish he wouldn't have to face them. He's still grieving and Fornell told me about the shit the parents are saying. They blame Justin for everything. I just want to punch them real hard and then throw them in jail to rot away."_ Tony muttered angrily.

_"Blondie is a though cookie, dude. He's been through so much and look at him."_ Hunter said.

_"He's right."_ Melanie added. _"After the bashing, the doctors said he would never be able to paint again. But he fought so hard to prove them wrong. His art helps him to deal with everything. He creates when he's happy, sad, upset or down. It's his way to deal with everything."_

_"Yeah, I know. But come to think of it, he never really had a break. Prom is supposed to be a magical night for young adults but Hobbs and Gold ruined it for him. Now, his wedding was supposed to be one of the greatest days in his life, a celebration of love but again, it was ruined and he's now a widower. Everyone has a breaking point and he hasn't been creating at all since that damn bomb. He's always sad. I know it takes time to get better and to grieve but Jethro and I are both worried and so is Brian."_ Tony tried to explain.

_"Pah... boy wonder is now after Brian. We almost died because of him and he's trying to seduce Brian now."_ Michael added angrily, making his dislike of Justin clear.

_"Justin isn't seducing Brian. He just lost his husband for fuck's sake. Justin is a good guy and Brian's trying to help."_ Tony retorted just as angrily.

_"No he's not. Brian has to take care of him. He's using my best friend."_ Michael shouted.

_"What the fuck? He isn't doing such a thing. Everyone can see that Brian's in love with Justin."_ Hunter muttered.

_"Now that's not true."_ Said Lindsay. _"Brian doesn't love Justin. He likes him because he is part of our group."_

_"Besides, Brian doesn't do love or relationships. I've known him since we were 14. He's a free spirit. He fucks, but doesn't love."_ Michael said proudly.

_"ENOUGH!"_ Yelled Gibbs angrily. _"How dare you talking about my son and Brian like that? You and Lindsay claim to be Brian's friends but you talk so badly about him that it makes me wonder if you are truly his friends. Leave them both alone or you'll deal with me. Is that clear?"_

_"Now wait Gibbs,..."_ Lindsay started but was interrupted by Gibbs.

_"I won't. You two are in my house talking shit about my son and Brian. If the two of you don't shut up I'll fucking kick you out. I've had enough of your bullshit."_ Gibbs sternly told Lindsay and Michael. Both of them huffed angrily but didn't say anything.

 

* * *

 

 

**Brian's thoughts during the living room debacle**

'What the hell is wrong with Mikey and Linds? I know they're not Justin's biggest fans for whatever reasons they might have but to say that kind of shit about him? Since he was released from the hospital, he was barely sleeping and eating, and was always in pain. Where do they see him seducing me? And fuck, Jethro is pissed. Thank fuck he's defending Justin. And me? Why does he defend me? They always talk about and to me like that. I know they're better than me. Isn't that what friends do? Let the other know about their faults? I know Linds and Mikey have theirs, just like I have mine and I have problems pointing them out but Jethro acts like they treat me wrong. Why?'

 

* * *

 

 

** Courthouse **

Justin sat between Gibbs and Brian while Hendrick's parents gave their statements. Lindsay and Michael stayed silent but glared at Justin and Gibbs all the time. When the judge finally sentenced the parents after many hours of waiting and listening, Justin was relieved and tired. Hendrick's parents would go to jail and would never be free again. All the evidence and no regret from the parents didn't give the judge a reason to show any kindness towards them.

On the way back to Gibbs' house, Justin fell asleep with his head in Brian's lap. Lindsay and Michael both scowled at the sight but Debbie's angry hissing and Brian's firm glare stopped them from saying anything. Ducky and Jimmy both were disgusted by Lindsay and Michael, Ellie and Abby were just angry and Tim couldn't understand their behavior at all.

_"What is your problem with Justin? What did he do to the two of you?"_ Tim asked.

_"It's not what he did to us per se, it's just..."_ Michael sighed, _"he wormed himself into our family and acts like he's better than everyone. And he's using Brian for his money. He makes Brian feel guilty because of the bashing."_

_"You wanna know the truth, Tim?"_ Emmett interrupted Michael's tirade.

_"Uhm, yes. I just don't get why Lindsay and Michael are so upset about Justin."_ Tim said.

_"It's simple: Jealousy. Lindsay is an art teacher but also worked in a Gallery and paints as well. But Justin is much more talented and even handicaped he is better than her. Also, Lindsay still has this fantasy of being Brian's wife. And Michael has been in love with Brian since forever. He's jealous that Brian and Justin are close. One would think that since Michael and Lindsay are both married that they would have moved on from their fantasies but nope. They're both still pinning for Brian and don't care that they hurt Ben and Mel. Another thing is that they both depend on the bank of Kinney. Lindsay is always asking for money because she had Brian's son. And Michael thinks that since his mother and uncle gave Brian shelter from his abusing parents, he owes him. That's it."_ Emmett told them.

_"Wow, Mel and Ben... how can you live with them knowing they want another man?"_ Ellie asked and then turned to look at Michael and Lindsay. _"Seriously, you both have wonderful partners. Why are you after Brian? You're truly pathetic."_

_"Okay, stop now."_ Debbie said. _"Today was pretty bad for our Sunshine. We should go home and get some rest."_

They all agreed and went to their cars to drive home.

 

** At Gibbs' House **

Tony was going through some cold cases when Justin walked into the kitchen in the middle of the night.

_"Hey Justin, couldn't sleep?"_ He gently asked the blonde man.

_"Not really. Why do they all hate me so much? Why couldn't they accept Hendrick? He was their son."_ Justin cried.

_"I really don't know, Justin. It is hard to understand how a parent could hate their own child so much."_ Tony said.

_"If I ever should be blessed to have a child I wouldn't care if he or she was gay, straight or bi or whatever. I would love him or her unconditionally."_ Justin almost whispered.

_"That's how it should be."_ Tony added gently. _"You're a good and brave young man, Justin and Jethro loves you and he's very proud of you. I'm proud of you, too."_

_"You love my dad very much, don't you?"_ Justin asked.

_"Yes, I do. I'd give my life for him."_ Tony told him.

_"Please, just make him happy. That's all I ever wanted for him. To be and feel loved. Brian said you know that they slept together?"_ Justin asked shyly.

_"Oh, uhm... yeah I... I saw them. Wasn't happy about it but I know it was for comfort."_ Tony answered warily.

_"Yeah, both are very complicated men. Brian is usually a top, you know. He has trust issues."_ Justin explained softly.

_"Does that mean he never topped Gibbs?"_ Tony asked confused.

_"Yep. Dad never bottomed but I can't say anything else. It's not my story to tell. Anyways, now that my dad is with you, they won't need that comfort anymore. You don't have to worry."_ Justin told him with a small smirk.

_"I don't worry. And I promise you that your dad's happiness is what matters to me. I'll try my best to always make him happy. I promise you that."_ Tony vowed.

_"You already do. He's so very happy now. He usually doesn't smile that much. I'm glad he has you now."_

_"I'm very glad to be with him, too. I'm glad Brian is there for you. He seems to be a good friend to you."_ Tony tried to say it casually.

_"He is. You know, I used to have such a huge crush on him. When I met him I said to Daphne that I saw the face of God and his name was Brian Kinney. God, I feel so childish thinking about it. He was my first and he was very gentle. I thought he was my destiny but Brian isn't interested in a relationship."_ Justin sighed.

_"Never say never, Justin. Maybe he just needs to meet the right person. Or, maybe he already met him but just didn't realize it but does now. What about your feelings for him now?"_ Tony asked gently.

_"I... I don't know for sure. I still have feelings for him, strong feelings but I really love Hendrick. I'm not made for casual hook ups or to be fuckbuddies with anyone. I can't share the person I love with anyone else. Brian wants to be free."_ Justin answered tiredly.

_"Does he? Or is it that he wanted to be free in the past and wants something completely different now? Maybe you should talk to him. Think about it."_ Tony said.

_"I will. Thank you for listening, Tony. I'm going back to bed. Good night."_ Justin said and went back to his room. Tony decided to stop working and went to bed as well. Gibbs was already sound asleep.

 

**Justin's thoughts after his chat with Tony**

'Tony really is a nice guy. Brian told me about his jealousy because he saw my dad with him. God that must have been a sight. I love my dad, he's the best but I wouldn't want to see him doing THAT. Especially not with Brian. Brian... why do I love him? Am I actually in love with him or is it just remains of the crush I had on him? I love Hendrick. He is... was a really good man.' Justin sighed. 'Why did Tony have to ask about my feelings for Brian? I thought I was over it... over him but I never was. When I met Hendrick I was still pining for Brian but that changed when I got to know Hendrick better. I admit that Brian still made my heart beat faster but I figured it was kind of normal. He was my first... everything. My first kiss with a man, first time sleeping with a man. It was a lot different with Hendrick, not worse or bad, just different. In a good way.'

Justin shook his head, trying to get away from comparing what he had with Hendrick and Brian. Both men were individuals and so completely different. Comparing them wouldn't help.

'I really love Hendrick but I also love Brian. Admitting that to myself wasn't easy but I feel more settled now. Shit, how am I supposed to deal with Brian now? Tony suggested talking to him... should I do that? What if Brian is going to be disgusted with me if I tell him how I feel? What if he thinks badly of me then? But... but did he and Tony talk? Tony questioned what I told him about Brian. Maybe Brian does want a relationship? With me?' A few tears fell and Justin made a very important decision. 'I will talk to Brian. I will tell him what's going on with me.'

**TBC**


	9. Chapter 9

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=29onxb8)

** Gibbs' House the next Day  
**

'What's wrong with me? My husband just died and I tell Tony that I'm still in love with Brian. Just what the fuck is wrong with me?' Justin thought bitterly. The young man was frustrated and so confused. Did he truly love Brian? Did he ever love Hendrick for real or was he just a placeholder for Brian? Sighing, he decided to grow some balls and talk to Brian, just like Tony had suggested the night before.

He walked into Gibbs' guest room where Brian slept. The ad exec was busy looking through files for a campaign.

 _"Hey Brian, do you have some minutes for me?"_ Justin asked quietly.

 _"Of course I do. What's going on, Sunshine? Are you in pain?"_ Brian asked with worry and concern in his eyes.

 _"No, I'm fine. Don't look at me like that, Brian. I am fine. No pain or anything. I just... I... Fuck! I'm confused. Please don't interrupt me, okay? I need to get it out."_ Justin mumbled but Brian nodded for him to continue.

 _"You know, I... I had this huge crush on you when we met and you took my virginity. I thought I was over you when I met Hendrick. I mean, you don't want a relationship and all that stuff and I really, really liked Hendrick. I did love him, still do, you know. But I realized that I never got over you tho. I'm still in love with you, more than with Hendrick and that's just so fucked up. I thought... I wanted... God, I married him. I planned to spend my life with him but I was in denial all the time. He could still be alive if I had been true to myself and admitted that I still loved you. I'm not asking for anything from you, Brian. Yes, I love you but I know that you see me as a friend and I respect that. I don't want our friendship to end because of my fucked up feelings. I'm a mess, and I know that but please, don't think I would want to change you or anything. I need you in my life, as my friend. Please Brian."_ Justin begged, sobbing.

Brian looked at the blonde. He tried to sort everything Justin told him and couldn't believe it. Justin still loved him? Was there still a chance for them?

 _"Justin, I was a fool. I cared more about my reputation and what others would think of me. I never thought someone could love me or want me for who I am. All my life, people wanted me for my looks, the sex or my money. You were the first who could see through all my mask and the bullshit I spouted to protect myself from getting hurt. You were never just a trick to me, Justin. And the prom... God, I thought I'd lose you. I... I couldn't do anything to save you and feared you'd die."_ Brian admitted. He took a deep breath before he said, _"I do love you, Justin. Not as a friend. I am in love with you, have been for a while but I thought you wanted Hendrick. Your happiness is what matters the most to me. And if it means that I have to let you go to be with someone else, then so be it. No matter how hard it might be. You deserve the world. I never had a relationship before. Fuck, I'm just a broken fuck machine and I'm afraid I'd end up hurting you. But if you want me, Justin, then I'm willing to give us a try."_

 _"I... oh my God, Brian. I never knew you felt like that. Yes, yes I want us to try but please let's it take it slow, okay?"_ Justin answered, overwhelmed by Brian's confession.

 _"Yeah, slow is good. Real good. Come here, Sunshine."_ Brian said and opened his arms to embrace Justin in a hug. They shared a first hesitant kiss before they both let go of their fears and kissed each other passionately.

 

**Brian's thoughts after his chat with Justin**

'He loves me. He still fucking loves me! After all the shit I put him through he still wants me. If I had been honest with him maybe he would never have married Hendrick. Fuck... Hendrick. I know Justin loved him, still does and a part of him will always love and remember him. He was a nice guy, caring and honest. He loved Justin more than anything else. Like I do. I still remember the day Justin introduced him to us. I wanted to kill him for claiming my sunshine but he really loved him...'

_**xxxFLASHBACKxxx  
** _ _"Hey Brian, mind if I join you?" Hendrick asked the ad ex. The family was still inside, they had their Weekly Sunday dinner at Deb's. Brian went out for a cigarette, needing to be away from Justin and Hendrick when the 'enemy' walked out to him._

_"Nope, don't mind but shouldn't you be inside?" Brian asked, his tone hiding his hatred and jealousy. He sounded annoyed._

_"Probably but I needed some air. Quite a night, huh? Your family is great. I'm glad Justin has all of you. You know with the job his dad has. He's always so worried about Mr. Gibbs." Hendrick spoke gently._

_"Of course he worries. Gibbs had a lot of near-death-experiences." He said and sighed. "Listen Hendrick, Justin means a lot to all of us. You hurt him and you'll deal with us." He warned the younger man._

_"I know. I don't want to hurt Justin. He's wonderful. He told me about you and him. Don't look so surprised." Hendrick laughed at Brian's expression. "I know about the two of you. Frankly, I don't understand how you couldn't tell him what you really feel but that's none of my business. I just want you to know that I want Justin to be happy. He means the world to me and I know that he needs you in his life. As a friend since he couldn't be with you in any other way and I respect that. God Brian, stop looking at me like that." Hendrick laughed again at the outraged look on Brian's face. "I'm serious. I hope you can show me the same respect. It's always Justin's choice." He said._

_Brian was silent for a couple of minutes, finishing his cigarette before he sighed and turned to the other man. "I do respect you and your relationship. As long as you don't hurt him. I... I care about him a great deal." Brian said and walked towards the house. "And Hendrick,... you're a good guy." He said and stepped back into Deb's house.  
_ _**xxxEndOfFlashbackxxx** _

Brian sighed. He truly respected and liked Hendrick. Maybe the young man would still be alive if he hadn't been such a coward. Another sigh.

'Back to the present' Brian thought. He thought of the kisses they had shared not too many hours ago. He looked at his sunshine, sleeping peacefully for the first time. Justin looked more relaxed, less pained, in his sleep. 'I can't repeat the same mistakes. I almost lost him twice. I need to show him how I really feel, I need to be open and honest with him. He was hurt enough, it's time for me to make him happy, to show him that life can be better. How do I do that? Fuck! What does he see in me? I'm a slut, broken, damaged. I'm not perfect or even close to. I'm an asshole but Justin seems to see something - or someone? - else in me. I know I'm different with him, I feel better, happier when he's with me. Fuck, I need to talk to Jethro.'

 

* * *

 

 

** At Ben and Michael's House **

Ben was restless. He had been since Emmett explained Lindsay and Michael's behavior to McGee and Ellie. It was Ellie's reaction that made him think. He loved Michael, with all his heart but did Michael love him back the same? He doubted it. It seemed that Michael still loved Brian Kinney more than anyone else. After the bomb exploded, Ben could hear Michael screaming for Brian, not him - his husband - or their daughter Jenny Rebecca. It hurt so much but as usual, Ben swallowed the hurt and moved on. But was this the life he wanted? To come second to his husband, after the best friend and not-so-secret love of his life? Ben knew he had to make a decision.

** At Mel and Linds' House **

Just like Ben, Melanie Marcus was thinking about the conversation between Emmett, McGee and Ellie. Lindsay used to think that Justin would be perfect for Brian but stopped her fawning as soon as Brian and Justin made it clear that they were friends only. Lindsay accepted and liked Justin, she even helped and supported him after the bashing but it all changed the very moment they all realized that Brian's feelings for Justin were different.

She began to snap at the young blonde man without reason, stopped including him in their activities and didn't want him to babysit for Gus and Jenny anymore. She also began to cling even more on to Brian, ran to him with every little problem. When she cheated with the artist Sam Auerbach she told Brian but not her. It took Melanie a lot of strength to forgive the affair but she loved Lindsay. Melanie also didn't want for Gus and JR (Jenny Rebecca) to live in a broken home but she couldn't stop the unsettling feeling that their home was broken already. Her wife wanted a man, she wanted Brian. Melanie used to blame Brian for always interfering in their lives but she realized that it wasn't the ad exec, it was her wife who ran to Brian every chance she got. Melanie would never forget the moment the bomb exploded: She and Lindsay were walking away with the kids away when they heard the loud boom. Lindsay let go of Gus' hand and ran back to the club screaming for Brian. Melanie was left standing on the sidewalk with two scared and crying children.

How could she still blame Brian when it was her wife who made her feel like she wasn't enough?

**TBC**


	10. Chapter 10

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=2a66v5l)

**Brian's chat with Gibbs**

Brian slowly walked down the stairs to the basement. He knew Gibbs was working on a closet for Justin's apartment. He smirked, knowing that Justin always preferred his dad's hand made furniture over "the shit from the stores", as Justin described it all the time. When he reached the last step his thoughts were interrupted by Gibbs.

_"Good memories?"_ Gibbs asked amused.

_"Huh?"_ Brian wondered out loud.

_"That smirk. You_ _'re_ _remembering something good?"_ Gibbs asked again with a teasing tone.

_"Something like that, yeah. Justin's sleeping."_ The brunette said.

_"Good, he needs a good_ _night's_ _rest. Got something on your mind?"_ Gibbs mused.

_"He loves me, Jethro. He told me this morning that he still loves me."_ Brian said.

_"I know. Everyone knows. Although it does seem to surprise you?"_ Gibbs wondered.

_"Yeah. Why does he love_ _me_ _? Why?"_ Brian just couldn't understand it.

Gibbs snorted and shook his head. _"Brian Kinney, you're a smart man but sometimes act like a fool. What's not to love? You might hide behind the many masks you created to protect yourself but Justin could always see beyond that. He was the first to know how much you loved your son. He always knew you care about people even though you pretend not_ _to_ _. You're not the asshole your so called friends an_ _d surrogate_ _mother say you are."_ He told the confused looking man.

_"Does that have anything to do with the shit Linds and Mikey spouted earlier today?"_ Brian wondered.

_"Yup, that and much more."_ Gibbs said and sighed. _"Brian, you are the first to help out your friends and family if needed. Not just financially,_ _but_ _emotionally. You just don't pack the truths into nice packages. You're honest most of the time. You started lying to yourself and when you finally believed the shit yourself, you said it out loud for them to hear. You're one of the least selfish people I know. You don't love and trust easily but when you do, you do it with all your heart and soul. You guard yourself from strangers but forgot that sometimes the people closest to you can hurt you worse."_ The silver haired man explained gently. _"You deserve better friends, Brian. Lindsay, Michael and Debbie can't see you for who you are. They just see what you want them to see. It should tell you something that Justin, who doesn't know you as long as they do, could see right through those masks of yours and they still can't."_ Gibbs said and turned off the light. _"Think about it. Go to bed, I'm sure Justin would sleep even better if you're there. Don't let the reputation you build for yourself destroy what you could have with someone who loves you for real."_ With that, Gibbs walked up the stairs to go to bed. Brian still stood there, like frozen.

'Fuck! The bastard knows me way too good. But shouldn't he know? He acts like a bastard to guard himself, too but since he got together with Tony he's using this pretense a lot less. Oh for fuck's sake... I love Justin and I'm going to be with him.'

 

* * *

 

 

** 2 Weeks Later **

Debbie invited the gang and Gibbs' team to one of her famous Sunday dinners. Tony and Gibbs arrived with Brian and Justin later than the rest and Michael and Lindsay both attacked the blonde man verbally right after he stepped into Debbie's living room.

_"What the fuck is going on here, Brian? Why are you holding the little shit's hand?"_ Michael yelled.

_"Shut up, Michael! That's none of your business."_ Brian replied angrily.

_"Brian, of course this is our business. Michael and I are your closest friends. We don't want Justin to use you. Don't you think it's very telling that he just buried his husband and is already holding your hand?"_ Lindsay tried to reason.

_"Pah, I bet they're already fucking, too. That little whore. Why did you have to save him, Brian? You should have left him laying on the floor to bleed out and fucking die."_ Michael shouted but before anyone could have said anything, he almost flew across the room right into the wall with a bleeding nose. Gibbs was just about to go at him again, when Brian caught his arm and stopped him.

_"No, Jethro. STOP! He's not worth it."_ Brian said, trying to calm Gibbs down.

_"I don't give a fuck. He can't sprout that kind of shit about my son and get away with it."_ Gibbs yelled.

_"What's with all the noise?"_ Asked Debbie, who was still in the kitchen but ran into the living room because of all the noise. After she took in the sight of her bleeding son, she asked shocked, _"What the fuck is going on? Michael, what happened?"_ Debbie was a true motherhen and couldn't stop fawning over her injured son.

_"Gibbs happened! The fucker hit me, Ma!"_ Michael cried, holding his nose.

_"I think you should kick the bastard out, Debs. He's an animal."_ Lindsay told her, looking rather smug.

_"Shut up, Lindsay. Debbie, my dad didn't mean to lose control so badly. We walked in and Lindsay and Michael started going at me and Brian. Michael shouted that Brian should have left me to die at the prom and Dad, he just lost control. It wasn't planned, Debbie. You know my Dad."_ Justin sobbed. Michael's animosity and hatred deeply shocked him.

_"WHAT?"_ Debbie yelled. _"Michael, what the fuck is wrong with you? You know how hard Sunshine had to fight to survive and you also know how hard all that shit was for Brian. Hell, you were right next to him at the hospital. You saw how much it affected him. How could you say such a thing? I'm so disappointed. You're my son and I love you but right now I'm so ashamed of you. Please, you and Lindsay should go home."_ Debbie said sadly.

_"Uhm, no. Actually Michael, you should get a room in some hotel. I can't stand to see the sight of you. This is all because you can't let go of your childish fantasies about Brian. I'm done playing second fiddle. We're over, Michael."_ Ben told Michael in front of everyone.

_"Same for you, Lindsay."_ Melanie added sadly. _"It's obvious that I am not enough for you. I'll take Gus and Jenny home. Please just go and pack your bags. I'm sick and tired of the shit you constantly pull. I guess it doesn't matter at this point but I'm aware that you're still seeing Sam. Maybe he wants you for real."_

_"Oh no, Mel. I'm not leaving without Gus. He is MY son, not yours."_ Lindsay snapped.

_"Forget that, Lindsay. I won't have this asshole Sam around Gus."_ Brian said angrily. _"And Mel is as much of a mother to him as you are."_

Lindsay just glared at Mel and Brian, then at Justin before she walked out of Deb's house, slamming the door. Michael followed her just as angry.

 

* * *

 

 

** Tony's thoughts through the Dinner **

'Holy shit! What the heck just happened? How can Michael and Lindsay claim to be Brian's friends? Hell, how can they claim to love him? They act like they own him. God, Mel and Ben look so lost. What's wrong with Michael and Lindsay? How can they not see just how great their partners are? And WOW! Gibbs totally freaked out. Not that I don't understand him punching Michael. I would have done the same if I hadn't been so shocked. But damn, he looked so hot. All manly. Okay, Gibbs always looks manly but ugh, I should stop thinking about that. A boner at the dinner table while children are here is not good.'

 

** Ellie's thoughts through the Dinner **

'WOW! WOW! WOW! That was heavy. I want to shoot both Michael and Lindsay. Gibbs looks like he wants to go after Michael and kill him with his bare hands.'

_"I'm sorry. I don't know what is wrong with my son."_ Debbie cried. Vic hugged his sister.

_"You don't have to apologize for his behavior, Debs. Michael needs to apologize. And Lindsay, too."_ Vic said gently.

_"Are you really that surprised about their behavior?"_ Emmett asked. _"I mean, let's be honest. Lindsay always acts like Brian's her husband and Michael acts like he owns Brian."_

'Interesting. I really should think about something for Michael and Lindsay. They shouldn't get away with that behavior.' Ellie smiled sweetly. She shared a look with Abby and McGee. They would come up with something as payback for the two idiots.

**TBC**


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of Tibbs and a little bit of Britin!

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=333bm7m)

**At Gibbs' House after the Dinner  
Gibbs and Tony**

Tony was worried about Gibbs. The silver haired man had been silent since they left Deb's house. It was understandable but Tony wanted his lover to be happy.

_"I'm sorry, Tony."_ Gibbs said quietly.

_"What would you be sorry for, Jeth?"_ Tony asked confused.

_"About punching Michael. I'm having problems to really regret it because I think he deserved it for saying that shit about my son but I'm a Special Agent. I should be in control of my temper. And I don't want you to think that I'm a violent person in general."_ Gibbs explained.

_"Oh God, Jeth! Don't worry about that. I know you're not a violent person. I know that our job forces us to use violence sometimes but that's it, it's part of the job. And I think the punch was justified. What he said was a lot worse than the punch. I can't believe he would say shit like that. All because of jealousy."_ Tony reasoned and Gibbs calmed down.

_"When Justin told me about him and Brian giving their relationship a try... he made me promise something. I wasn't sure when to talk to you about it and I'm not sure now is the right time or place but after what happened at Deb's, I have to tell you."_ Gibbs stammered.

_"Jethro, what's wrong? You're scaring me here."_ Tony asked.

_"I'm sorry, Tony. You know about me and Brian, right?"_ Gibbs asked and continued after Tony nodded. _"Brian is usually a top. He has trust issues because of his childhood and some friendships. He doesn't bottom often or for everyone. I'm similar to him but unlike him, I cannot bottom at all. It's not just about trust for me. I had a boyfriend when I was 15 or 16. I don't really remember it that much because I tried to forget about it. Anyways, we were dating for a couple of months and had made out but I wasn't ready for more. Well, he was and one evening he drugged me. I couldn't move or stop him. When he was finished he left and I laid there waiting for the drugs to fade. I never saw him again. It was my first time and since then, every time I was with a guy, I never bottomed."_

_"Shit Jethro, I'm so fucking sorry you had to go through this."_ Tony sobbed and hugged his lover tightly.

_"Thank you, Tony. That's one of the reasons I lost my temper today. Justin... he might not be my son by blood but I was there when he was born, I watched him grow up, you know. He is my son. I love him like my son and after the prom... I thought I had lost him. I was a mess and there was nothing I could have done to help him. He had to fight this himself. I would have given everything to take the pain and everything from him. I would have gladly took the bat myself to protect him. And when Michael said that he should have died, I... it was just too much. I really, really wanted to kill the bastard. The moment he said it, I saw Justin again. Covered in blood, lifeless. His heart stopped beating twice in the ambulance."_ Gibbs explained softly, his voice shaky.

_"I understand you better now. You want to protect him from everything that is bad in this world. Sadly, some people he considered friends turned out to be evil bitches to him. And with your terrible experience and Justin being gay, I can see why you are so worried and protective. I want you to know that I won't ever pressure you, Jethro. I love and respect you. If it's only me bottoming in our relationship it won't be a problem for me. Especially not if it's with you. I love it when you make love to me."_ Tony said passionately and the two shared a gentle kiss.

_"But that's the thing Tony. I want you to make love to me. I know you would never hurt me. Just take it slow, okay?"_ Gibbs asked almost shyly.

_"Of course, Jethro."_ Tony promised and took his lover's hand and lead him to their bedroom where he began to get rid of their clothes. When they were naked, Tony gently laid Gibbs down and dropped feather light kisses all over his body. When Gibbs was relaxed enough for Tony's piece of mind, the younger man grabbed the lube and prepared his lover properly. After he added a 3rd finger, Gibbs was already begging for Tony to finally love him.

Tony pushed gently into Gibbs, giving his silver haired man the time to adjust before he started to slowly pump into Gibbs' ass. When they both reached their climax, they collapsed happily and satisfied and fell asleep promptly.

 

**At Gibbs' House after the Dinner  
Brian and Justin**

Brian Kinney was seething. How could his 'friends' dare to treat Justin so badly? He wanted to lash out, punch something or better, someone but he knew that Justin was devastated and needed him. He took the blonde man into his arms and kissed him passionately. Since they had decided to give their love a chance they had only kissed and shared blow or hand jobs but they both needed more tonight. Justin quickly got rid of their seemingly offending clothes, grabbed a condom for Brian and lube. He prepared himself for his lover's big cock and enjoyed watching Brian watching him. The sight of Justin preparing himself alone almost made Brian cum. They made love twice before they fell asleep in each others arms.

**TBC**


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter :)

[](http://de.tinypic.com?ref=im5kix)

** 1 Year Later **

Gibbs stopped working on his boat to answer his phone. Brian and Justin had gone to Vermont 3 weeks ago but would be coming home tonight. Tony drove to the airport to pick the two up. He and Gibbs had helped to find a house for the two love birds. Amazingly, both couples were still going strong.

The fallout from the diner at Deb's house one year ago was hard on Gus and Jenny. After breaking up with Lindsay, Mel took care of Jenny herself for a while until her ex-girlfriend Leda stopped by to visit. The two reconnected pretty quickly and luckily, Leda and Jenny got along very well.

It was a little harder on Gus, tho. Mel and Brian worked together to get his rights reinstated and managed to get Lindsay's right completely revoked. She never bothered to request time with her son after she realized that she couldn't use the young boy to get money from Brian anymore. She married Sam and they moved to Paris. Gus moved in with Brian and Justin, who adopted the boy two months after Lindsay left. Gus couldn't understand why his mommy wasn't around anymore but after a couple of weeks he stopped asking for her. Whenever he called her, she would tell him that she was too busy to talk to him. It hurt him badly but his daddy, Justin and momma Mel, Leda, Tony and grandpa Gibbs would do everything to help him. Gus knew he was loved.

Debbie, who was like a mother to Brian, Ted and Emmett tried to not force the gang to forgive Michael but in the end, he was her son and she would always support him. She blamed Brian for always leading him on and told Justin that if it wasn't for him, Michael and Ben would still be together. After that, Brian ignored her calls and stopped going to the diner. She tried to use Ted and Emmett to get Brian to listen to her but they wouldn't help her. It wasn't until Michael started drinking and ended up in jail for driving around drunk that the two stopped talking to Debbie. The woman demanded that Ted and Emmett would help her son but since both, Ted and Emmett loved their partners Blake and Drew enough, they left Debbie, along with Michael and Lindsay, behind and moved on with their lives.

Brian and Justin got married in Vermont without anyone being there. After Brian proposed, Justin confided in Gibbs and Tony and they told him to follow his heart and do what felt right for him. After that, Justin said yes. Tony had been planning a party with the help of Emmett, Abby and Ellie. The gang, or what was left of them, welcomed Gibbs' team into their circle quickly.

Gibbs and Tony decided to wait with marriage. They just wanted to enjoy being together without the pressure of planning a wedding. Tony moved in with Gibbs after five months and decided that they didn't want any children because of their demanding jobs and the long hours. Instead, Tony came home one day with two small cats.

Surprisingly, Leon Vance congratulated his two agents and didn't try to split the team. His only demand was that Gibbs and Tony wouldn't bring their romance to work, which neither did.

 

* * *

 

 

**Brian and Justin's Wedding  
** **Justin's Thoughts**

'I still can't believe we're actually in Vermont, it's fucking amazing.' Justin thought. Brian had surprised him with the tickets. He suspected that Brian wanted to get married during their vacation. He still remembered Brian's huge smile when he finally accepted his proposal. At first, he couldn't give the brunette an answer because it happened too fast for Justin but after a long talk with his dad and Tony he had followed his heart and said 'yes'. Brian's eyes shone so bright and were filled with happiness. Justin thought he fell even more in love with him that day. The ad ex even understood that Justin didn't want to get married right away and wanted to wait. But now he was ready for their wedding.

 

**Brian's Thoughts**

'I know he would love to have his dad and Gus here, hell I wish they were here, too but Gibbs told us to do what was right for us. I didn't want the gang here. Justin and I had been though hell and back and I wanted this special event to be for us only. I can't believe how easy being in a relationship with Justin is. We're the perfect team, totally in sync with each other. He even started to paint again and is now working on campaigns with me whenever he can. After he healed properly he went back to PIFA and finished his last semester pretty soon. I sold the loft and moved in with Justin, okay more like moved in with him and his dad. Tony's living there as well. Gibbs is really happy and they're going strong. I still remember Tony's jealousy... God he was really dense back then.' Brian thought and chuckled. 'But he's the one for Gibbs and he had been a huge help for me and Justin. He's probably our biggest supporter – after Gibbs and Gus of course. Melanie did a great job with him in the past few months. Ben and Hunter were there for her, too. Now, I can't wait to tell Justin that Gus will be living with us – in our own house. I wanted an apartment first but Gibbs suggested a house and I have to admit that he was right. He and Tony found a great one for us. They're getting it ready with Gus' help.' Brian was raised out of thoughts by the minister clearing his throat.

" _Mr. Kinney, we are ready. Would you and Mr. Taylor please follow me."_ The minister, whose name Brian already forgot, told them.

Brian and Justin followed the minister into the little chapel, amazed at the simple yet romantic look.

" _Brian, look at this. Those are golden gardenias. I had no idea they had those."_ Justin said happily with a huge smile. _"They're beautiful."_

Brian enjoyed watching the happiness in Justin's face, especially his eyes. They were dancing and shining. This was the right decision, he was sure about that. Justin was 'the one' for him.

He gently took Justin by the arm and lead him towards the minister. After they exchanged their vows, the minister declared them husband and husband and the two love birds sealed the ceremony with a passionate kiss.

" _Forever Sunshine. You and I are forever."_ Brian whispered as he laid his forehead against Justin's. _"Nothing and no one can tear us apart."_

 

* * *

 

 

** Lindsay, Michael and Debbie **

After moving to Paris with her husband Sam, Lindsay figured out that Sam was cheating on her since day one. She was mad at herself for leaving with Sam, instead of staying close to her son and Brian but Ellie Bishop made it impossible for her. The blonde agent made sure that either the police or child Services would show up unannounced at her and Sam's place and they found enough drugs to arrest them. So in the end, they moved to Paris.

Michael's life wasn't any better. After his stay in jail for drunk driving, Debbie made him see a therapist but he wasn't willing to accept that he, and only he, was to blame for everything that went wrong in his life. Since the house he and Ben lived in with Hunter, was only in Ben's name, he had to move in with his mother. His whining and laziness caused a lot of troubles in Debbie's relationship with Carl. The police officer left her shortly after Michael's moving in. People on Liberty pretty much ignored him and Brian banned him from Babylon, Kinnetic and every other property he and Justin owned.

Ellie, McGee and Abby kept their eyes on Lindsay and Michael to make sure they would never be able to hurt the people that Gibbs brought into their lives. Debbie had tried to apologize to Brian and Justin but she was never welcomed again as she tried to organize meetings for Michael with his daughter. Jenny was in need of therapy after spending time with him. Gibbs and Tony vowed to protect their family.

 

**The End**

**Author's Note:**

> Our beta was loahisi  
> I'm part of "The-Tibbs-Experience" and my fellow members agreed that this story could be posted here.


End file.
